New Ink and Autumn.

My one never wavering adoration in life has always been the rain. I love the smell, I love the sound... I love the colour it paints the world. Yesterday while I was at work it seemed like a bright and sunny day, until it flipped a switch and started pelting down in sheets that broke through our automatic doors. And just like that, it was whisked away again. Childishly, it felt like a present, just for me. Sorry to those eight thousand people left without power for the afternoon.

I know it's not very original, typing out posts about the weather... but here I go again, all the same.

First day of autumn today. I mean, the real first day, when you wake up and everything's crisp for the first time of the year. I used to love it. And in a way, I guess I still do. The fresh scent and lip-chapping breeze haul back every memory left behind in all the year's past. And they all make me smile. Even the ones I didn't smile at, at the time.

I guess today; this week, I'm just happy. Uncomplicated hope, irrational smiling... maybe it's just because it's my birthday tomorrow, but I have this inexplainable, giddy joy right now. I think May's gonna be a good month.

April had it's ups and downs... here's one of it's ups:

My new piece of ink, in traditional "tramp stamp" placing. I'm very please with the outcome... and my perseverance as I don't consider myself very brave when it comes to pain.

Secret Little Code Words.

For the most part I enjoy work. I like having something to do that takes my mind off... well, the everything and nothing that consumes my every waking moments. And again, for the most part, I enjoy the awesome people that I work with most days, the tasks performed and the endless need to put on a big smile for every tedious transaction. I know it's a bit cliche, but I think smiles are infectious... force yourself to smile enough and you start doing it without thinking.

But this post is for the other parts. The days where a twelve hour shift for less than minimum pay just doesn't feel fare. The customers that just want to abuse you to make themselves feel better, and bigger, than they are. And foremost, this is for the other people I'm forced to work with that make it all worse.

Flamingo.

Old Ideas.

I've been working on some painted stop motion animation... just mucking around till I remember everything I've forgotten about the medium.

This is a still from my second attempt.

Grey, Grey Skies.

It's raining on my day off. A vast improvement on last week's heat. I love the rain.


Perfect day for a little sketching... nothing pretty, just a bit of mindless practice.

I'm in Love With a Dream.

I'm nearing twenty six now, and I still fall short of everything I'd hoped I'd achieve... but still every night I lie awake, thinking of tomorrow and all it's endless possibilities.

I did something uncharacteristically brave yesterday. I applied for a job that I'd actually enjoy. To the few people I mentioned it to I said that it was over my head, beyond my abilities. In truth, I don't really think it is. To be completely honest I think I'd be great at it.
But I'll try not to dwell on it. The ad was three weeks old, and I only stumbled upon it by accident as I was re-searching retail jobs after my last payslip didn't quite meet my hopes.
Usually I feel that I can sell myself and almost anything through my words... but reading back what I'd sent in for the application made me cringe. I feel a great deal of shame when my writing reads messy. And I needed my words to sell me, cause I've got nothing on paper worth a damn.
Ah well, maybe next time. At least I've grown the balls to dream bigger.

Rain, Rain, Come to Play.

More hurting feet, more irritating customers.
Tonight it rained halfway through our volley ball game. It was hot and muggy to begin with, and the wet sand clung to our clothes and skin, but the rain fell down with increasing volume and freshness (if that even is a word). It was perfection.

Another nightly wacom sketch.

Lightbulb.

Back to the world or retail... annoying, pain in the rear customers who complain about every little detail that you don't have the authority or seniority to change even if you wanted to.
Plus, my feet hurt.
Though I like the part where I fill in my hours and think longingly towards the day when I get reimbursed for my time, so that I can pay off every cent I owe so I can buy more things that I have to pay off later.
And round and round we go.

Quick wacom sketch before bed.